the story

So we hung the Christmas lights, and decorated the tree, and bought presents, and sent out cards, and ate the turkey - or goose - or pig, depending on your tradition - and left cookies out for Santa, and listened for the reindeer, and - oh well, now it's all over. We survived another Christmas season.

It's a great bunch of stories mixed up in this Christmas stuff. Santa and Rudolf and the elfs and the tree and the mistletoe and the three wise guys - men - whatever, and the shepherds and donkeys and camels and even some manger and baby and frankincence and stuff. Bunch of stories.

At church we looked at stories today too. "The people worshipped the Lord all the days of Joshua, and all the days of the elders who outlived Joshua, who had seen all the great work that the Lord had done for Israel. [...] that whole generation was gathered to their ancestors, and another generation grew up after them, who did not know the Lord or the work that he had done for Israel."
Oh, the stories the elders used to tell around the camp fires! Plagues and the parting of the sea, and a God who goes out camping with a bunch of runaway slaves, and a pillar of fire and a voice of thunder and city walls crumbling at the sound of God's people praising their God... Great stories; and they witnessed them all, they saw it all with their very own eyes.
But then a whole new generation grew up. The postmodern generation. They did not see the miracles their granparents were talking about, they did not witnessed the stories, it was not their thing and, well, he was not their God. Not really. Oh, they knew all about it, but they did not know Him. They had no experience of an adventure with Him. So they went looking for other stories. The book of Judges is the book of ten generations, one after another, leaving The Story in order to try and find their own story. They went looking for their own dream, and every time their dream ended up in nightmare.

I think this is where we are in the church today. So many of us lost touch of the great overarching story; we know it all right, but it's not OURS. It's the story of the book, or the tradition, or the story of our forefathers. It's not our everyday life.
And yet that story is all along waiting to burst into the everyday, into the mundane of our life. You can see it hiding behind the corners, and lurking in the shadows; you can catch a glimpse here and there; but who's paying any attention? It's just that old story, isn't it?

Christianity is sick, but it's not sick because of lack of knowledge or lack of theology or theologians, it's not from lack of resources or buildings or funds or programs. Oh, we have it all wrapped up nice and neat; it's just that, largely, it's not our story. Not really. We know it, but how many of us live it? We believe in miracles - as long as we are not expected to pray for one, or maybe live one. We believe in the supernatural, as long as the supernatural stays well away from the everyday.

Well, it turns out the supernatural is just around the corner. A prayer answered. A life changed. A dream captured. A relationship healed. A heart restored. No, our God hasn't changed - we did. Maybe it's time we wake up?!?

When it rains...

I am in the midst of the most interesting answer to prayer for a while. I have been 'living by faith' - as in, without any proper income, for over a year now. I applied for all sorts of jobs, I placed bids for all sorts of programming and web projects, I tried everything I could think of, all to no help. We survived, barely, but we've been sinking deeper and deeper into debt. The crunch point was when the bailiff came at our door, regarding the money we owe towards the council tax. We just didn't have them.

So that is when I told the Lord that I can not go on like this. I came here knowing that this is the church the Lord called me to, and we have seen the Lord working in people's lives, and in the church. By his grace, this church that one year ago was contemplating closure, is now growing and planning with confidence for the future. But the thing is, my family and I are sinking. I had to do some deep sould searching to see if I shouldn't just look for some other place, some other church, some other ministry. But in the end, I told the Lord that, as long as his calling does not change, I am here to stay, even if we end up homeless or worse.

Well, last week I earned a bit over £50, which is an insignificant amount but better then I've been earning lately. On Sunday, as we were getting ready to leave for church, I struggled woth the idea that I should take £5 to give in the offering - even though we don't have enough to survive another week. Somehow, I said in the end, "Lord, I trust you. You promised to look after us. I am here at your call and doing your work - I trust in your faithfulmess."

Aas a background - some 5 months ago the church voted to pay me a very modest salary, but the treasurer refused to pay it until now. And some 4 months ago we were told that the Baptist Association approved a small mission grant towards my salary as well. But then nothing came of that either. Meanwhile my computer work has completely dried out.

So back to last Sunday. I went through the service, and gave those 5 pounds in the offering plate, and then - at the end of the service - the treasurer goes to my wife and hands her the cheque with my salary for October! It's not a lot, it would only cover half of our regular house bills, not including food or anything else for us - but it was a gift from God! And then, on Tuesday, she comes and gives me the back pay for the last 4 months. Which is just enough to keep the bailiff off our back! Also on Tuesday, we got word that the grant from the Association is on its way. And during this week I've been in discussions with a company in the US for a fairly major database project. I don't have the contract in hand yet but it looks like it's firmly on. And then yesterday a brother from an advertising company calls to say that the project they rejected a month ago is now back on the table. And then another former customer calls to give me some work. And tonight yet another former customer called to ask if I can do some work for him. In the meanwhile, the city sent a letter saying I only owe them half of the council tax.

So I got all this for £5??? It's not the money, I know - the Lord is faithful.

Another month...

So it's been over a month since the last post.

The greatest thing was the baptism we had a couple of weeks ago. It was such a priviledge to baptise two of my own sons! There are few things that are as moving for a father, as leading his own sons in the covenant of baptism. Of course, it was great to baptise Matthew and Cynthia too.

The Walk study went well so far - I love the interaction and discussions we get every Tuesday. It's great to see new - and even not so new - Christians 'getting it' and growing. I am a disciple maker at heart, I love this more than any other aspect of being a pastor, and being in this church has been a true blessing.

And then, we are still living our faith adventure. It is great to see how the Lord leads us on, one step at a time. When it looks like we are finally sinking, He throws us a lifeline and we're continuing to 'float' a while longer. It's not the easiest kind of life, but it is a life in which we are keenly aware that every day we're alive, every day we have a roof over our heads and food on the table, it's by the direct action of the Lord, and by His grace. Someone asked me if it's difficult to have faith when you go through a time like this. Well, it is difficult to NOT have faith - when you have no choice but to rely completely on God, and when you see His hand at work every day, there's no place for doubts. You get to know God personally and intimately, because He is a real, tangible part of your everyday life.

And finally, next Saturday it's my induction service. I never knew what an induction service was, until now - we don't have that kind of ceremony in Romania, and I never heard of it in the States either. Leave it to the Brits to come up with interesting ways to celebrate the beginning of a new faze in a pastor's ministry. It's a lot of hustle and bustle, but I look forward to it. And after next Saturday, I'll be the 'properly official' pastor of Ford Baptist Church. Maybe I should be driving a Ford too?!?

the great adventure

Sorry, guys and gals, I've been so busy that posting here just faded in the background.

We had a wonderful Open House yesterday, the openness and love was so evident in everyone present. Ford Baptist, I am so blessed to be your pastor!
I was looking over what the Lord has been doing in the last few months. The first growth spur seems to have plateaued at the moment, but I have no worries - it will start again soon. A few people became part of our church family. Four people are waiting to be baptised next Sunday. I can see lives being touched and changed. A few people are battling with depression, and they find help and support here. Someone's gotten in trouble with the police, and is now back with the Lord and looking for help to put his life back together. New Christians are growing closer to the Lord. A few parents are staying on for the service rather than just dropping their kids to church and picking them up again later. Although that in itself is really amazing too. We even had a dog in church today - no kidding! The Lord is doing great things in people's lives here, and my family and I are so priviledged to be part of it! Evelina is really back in her element, gathering a flock of friends and being the soul of everything going on.

But what blesses me most is the love you can feel in the church. It hits you as you walk through the doors; people laughing and smiling and chatting and making this such a wonderful place. It hit me when a visitor from another church told me at the end of a service - "I can't believe how much love there is in this church!" Yeah, Lord! That's what it's all about. We can't convince people into the kingdom, I can't preach them into the Kingdom - but if we love them into the Kingdom, we're doing it the right way.

Yes, sure, it's an adventure, and I'm back at it with a vengeance. Over the years I had forgotten what it's like to live by faith. When you're down to the last pennies, and there is no food in the fridge and no money to pay the bills, it gets scary and stressful. But God is our Daddy - he's never let us down yet, and he'll never fail in his faithfulness. Oh, I wish I could come even close to deserving it - but it's all about His grace. That amazing, wonderful, never-ending grace.

Oh yes, I love the Lord, and I love this little church, and I'm enjoying every moment (well, almost...) of this adventure. There is nothing I'd rather do and no place I'd rather be. And definitely no church I'd rather be a part of.

the day we murdered God

We had a great Good Friday service, if I may say so myself. :-)
Apart from the regulars and the visitors from the Morice Church, we had two visitors from the community. One is a lady who was on her third visit, so I'm hoping she is getting stuck with us. Another is a man who lives just up the road, we had a nice and looong chat after church. I hope for lots more visitors for the main service on Sunday.

I didn't have this problem for a long time, but I choked a bit during the sermon; now, if the preacher impresses himself to tears, maybe it wasn't too bad. I had lots of people commenting on the sermon after the service.
This is the bit that had me choked:

God came to us, and we arrested Him; we treated Him like a criminal; we condemned Him in a mock trial; we laughed at Him; we slapped Him in the face; we put a crown of thorns on His head; we flogged Him; we spat on him; we pulled the hairs of His beard out; we paraded Him on the streets of Jerusalem, carrying a heavy, wooden cross; we drew nails through His hands and feet; we put Him on a cross, and made Him die a slow, painful, horrible death. We did this to God.
Throughout history, we humans have done a lot of sins. Lying, stealing, murder, adultery, hatred, war, genocide, terrorism, gossip, slander, hatred... the list goes on and on. There are so many bad things we've done. But the worse, the most heinous, the most disgusting sin we have ever done, was that when God came to us, we tortured and murdered Him.
This is what we are celebrating today. Good Friday is the day when we tortured and murdered our God. Good Friday is the day we, the human race, committed the worst sin we've ever done. Good Friday is the day when we rejected God is the worst way possible. All the sin of all of humanity in all of time, culminated in the sin we committed that day.
By all accounts, that should have been the end of the human race. That should have been the day when God would wipe us out of existence; that should have been the day when God destroyed the whole of creation. Because on that day we took our rebellion against God to its final conclusion. That day, we showed God how much we hate Him.
That wasn't “Good Friday” - it wasn't even just bad Friday, or worst Friday – it was the worst day ever. In the whole history of the Universe, that was the worst day.
And God used that day, and He used that sin – the worst sin we've ever done, in order to show us who He is. He took “worst Friday” and turned it into “Good Friday.” He took our worst sin and made it into the gateway for our salvation. He took our worst display of rage and hatred and rebellion in order to show us His love. He took that moment when we tried to break with Him in a complete and final way – and made it into a door for reconciliation. The day we murdered Him, was the day He made it possible for us to become His children.
If we ever wonder who God is, we just have to look at that day. He is the God who would do all that for us – in order to save us. He saw our broken lives, our loneliness, He saw how lost and miserable we are, He saw the tragedy of our lives – and He decided to do something about it. He took the greatest tragedy and turned it into salvation. He took the greatest sin and turned it into grace. He took the greatest display of hate and turned it into love. He came to those who tortured and murdered him, and called us to be his beloved children. He took our hell, and offered us heaven.

God's faithfulness

"God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful." (1 Corinthians 1:9). Such a simple statement, isn't it? God is faithful. He called us into fellowship with His Son, and He is faithful - He will keep His word. This is the unshakeable foundation of our faith.

I was reminded of this last night as I listened to the presentation of Shekinah Mission. They started as a work of faith, in response to a need, and the Lord has been faithful. They are now touching countless lives, and the Lord is transforming them and calling them to Himself. A small group of people, who had no funds or buildings or organisation behind them - people who had a dream and were ready to run with it - placed themselves in the hands of our Lord, and He used them to build what Shekinah Mission is today.
I am being reminded of this every time the Lord answers a prayer, or a need, or when He draws a new soul into the fellowship of His church. Yesterday's passage was all about grace (John 8: 1 -12). Jesus, the light of the world, showing His light in grace towards a woman who was just a pawn in the game the Pharisees were playing. Jesus, showing grace even to the pharisees who were there to trick him into breaking the law. Jesus, showing that He is not about power and coercion, but about love and forgiveness and freedom. About opening up a new door of hope. I live because of His grace. Ford Church is here because of His grace. God is faithful, and because He is, we have a hope and a future.

thinking about the future

I feel a bit like Mary, who used to keep in her heart extraordinary things happening in the early years of the life of Jesus - and wondering what kind of man He will grow up to be. Events continue to sweep over me, and I'm trying to make sense of what the Lord is doing in this church.

Last week I had lunch with Baroness Cox, with the Lord Mayor of Plymouth and his wife, and a few other dignitaries. Both the baroness and the mayor gave me their cards and asked that I contact them, and I had interesting discussions with them. The mayor wants to come and visit our Boys' Brigade and Girls' Brigade - to show their support for the work we do with the children. Baroness Cox wants to put me in contact with a few people she knows, regarding ministry in Eastern Europe and to Eastern Europeans here in the UK. I have no idea why I ended up meeting with a member of the House of Lords and the mayor and his wife - I'm not interested in politics - but somehow the Lord arranged things so I got there.

People continue to just come and contact us, there Lord is drawing people in before we even get a chance to do anything about it. Last Sunday I was away preaching at a different church, but at Ford there were about 60 people. We got to the point where we need to start meeting again in the main hall, we don't fit any more in the middle hall we've been using over the winter. I've been praying that the Lord will give us at least 100 people regularly during the Sunday worship, before the end of the year. We seem to be getting there ahead of my schedule - a great problem to have! I look around and there is so much need for love, for grace, for a vision and for encouragement. We had the Baptist Association's meeting last Saturday, and I could sense the discouragement and feelings of helplessness in many of the people present. Churches have been shrinking, a few have closed down and there are a few more that face closure unless something is done about it. One church building burned down recently. And yet, all around us there are hundreds of thousands of people who need the Lord, and many of them are somewhat open to the Spirit - they just need the right community, and need people who would lead them to the Lord. I hope we get to be that kind of church. I feel like the farmer standing before a great harvest - one I did not sow or worked for. It's only His grace.

Monday!

We had a smaller group yesterday in the morning service - but a bigger number than usual in the evening. Quite a few people were away, and we had only a few children.

But things are happening. One young man from the neighbourhood came for a visit in the morning, came back in the evening, and is already interested in joining the church. Last week I distributed a trial run of 50 leaflets on a street by the church - and he is the first result.
One man found our website and contacted me, first to ask about some local history, and then to tell me that he is moving in the area, wants to visit the church, and would like to eventually be married in our church.
Last night, just after the service, a young lady came to have a look around. She is moving in the area, is getting married, has never had a church home and is looking for one. Very soon we were talking about her desire to learn more about faith, to be baptised, to become part of our church. We will have to start baptism classes after Easter - she is the third person asking about baptism.

It feels like events are just taking over, pushed by an invisible hand. The only time I experienced something like this was when planting the church in Barlad. It is as if the Lord had people already open and looking for a church, and He was just waiting for the church to get a grip. Morice Baptist, our partner church, is experiencing the same thing - after years of decline, suddenly new people are coming in, all by themselves. This is what I was hoping for, but not really what I was expecting.

Of course it does not mean we can stop reaching out; it is our duty as a church to go into the community and reach people for the Lord any way we can. But what I think is happening is that the Lord already had people whose heart was open, but the church was not ready for them. We are not there yet, there is a long way to go, but the feel of the church is definitely changing. The Lord is at work - we just need to try and catch up. I need to catch up - I'm still in a bit of a daze and haven't quite got a grip on things.

Last night I had troubles with the sound system, and one of the songs (Beautiful Lord) was more or less murdered. The sound guy wasn't there and I could not find the wire to connect my laptop to the amp. We survived it, but I have to learn where everything is and how everything works - we can't have this happen in a Sunday morning service. The evening sermon was a bit undercooked; I haven't quite managed to catch up with my message schedule. I'm getting there. I'm a visiting preacher somewhere else this coming Sunday, and then a bunch of meetings around Easter are coming. And then we kick start our Living with Christ small group series. I've got to get all of that ready soonest. And to plan the baptism and membership class, and to make my preaching plan for after Easter. Things are getting really interesting and exciting! I've still got a few things dragging me down - particularly the whole financial thing - but then, I've got to put in practice what I was preaching last night: step out in faith! The Lord is faithful - it's just a question of me, and us as a church, being faithful.

Failing

Craig Groeschel of lifechurch.tv wrote a book imaginatively called "It." Apparently it's now available on video, and there is a chunk of video on the blog, here.

I had my share of failures - well, maybe more than my share. If you didn't fail much, it may be because I used some of your share too. The last couple of years have been filled with a lot of failure and not a lot of success. So I could feel getting a bit more cautious and unsure of myself. I think I really needed to see this video. I like the quote, "For us failure is not an option - it's a necessity." I learned a lot from the attempt to plant Imagine!, and from the short time at United Faith in Pittsburgh. Imagine! failed miserably and United Faith didn't move forward much under my leadership. But these experiences taught me a lot about myself and about the kind of team and process required to successfully plant or restart a church in a culture that is radically different from my own. What I did NOT learn is that I should stop trying. Here I am, doing it all over again. I can't even imagine a life where I am not involved in a church and in bringing people to a close relationship with Christ.

So, anyway - there is an adventure ahead. A big, exciting, perilous adventure. Yeah, I might fail LOTS of times - no, scratch that, I will fail in very imaginative ways; but what's the use of trying something if you already know the outcome and every step on the way? the great thing about life with Christ is not that we are safe and secure in the knowledge that all is going to be OK; rather, it's the knowledge that the Lord is working in and through us in spite of all our mess-ups. It's the fact that we know it's all beyond our capabilities - it's a God thing; but the Lord is there to lead us and carry us through.

So, "It" is now on my wishlist. If you were wondering what to give me for my birthday - now you know.

Little details

OK, I may sound like I'm pulling myself up by my bootstraps; I probably am. But the thing is, if I can not trust the Lord in the little details of life, like bills and money and a place to live - how could I trust him with the big things - with lives that need to be changed, with eternal souls to be saved, with winning this corner of the world for Christ? And the thing is, the big, important things are happening.

If you haven't guessed, this is my Monday high. We had 38 people in church yesterday - not a lot by most people's standard, but when half of them are not saved yet, it really sounds like victory to me! Eileen was there last night - I was so thrilled to see her! A few years ago she gave up on church - but now, after losing her husband, her son and her grandson, she is willing to give it another try. All we did was show her a little love - there is so much more where that came from! There are a lot of lonely, hurting people all around us - and we who follow Jesus have been connected to an infinite ocean of love: the heart of God! People may not accept theology and sermons and "church" - but give them open, genuine, disinterested, vulnerable love - and they are suddenly open wide.
Two people asked if I can visit them to talk about them joining the church. A third one said he is thinking about it too. A lady wants to talk about being baptised. There is this teenage guy who's waiting for baptism too. A father of 6, who is really struggling to keep his family together, opened up a lot this week and allowed me a peek into his struggle and pain. I KNOW the Lord is working there - there is a lot of pain, but with our Daddy, there is a lot of hope too. And I haven't even started to visit people in the community - what's that going to be like?

"The gates of hell shall not prevail against [my church]" - that's what Jesus promised. Gates of hell? What gates? We belong to the One who smashed them to pieced long ago - we're just here receiving the freed captives, and guiding the ones trying to find the way out. Yeah, sure, there might be a fiery arrow here and there, a few threats shouted by the enemy - a few reminders that there is a battle raging even though we are the victors - but when the prize is eternity for every one of these dear ones, who cares for the little details?

Faith

The last few days I've been reminded constantly of the simpler times, at the beginning of my ministry, when it was so much easier to step out in faith - childish, sometimes (OK, often) silly, foolish faith. It was childish and foolish, but it gave me the opportunity to see God's direct actions in my life over and over again.

Like the time when I bought a one-way ticket to Vienna, Austria, in order to look for a Bible school or some other place where I can be trained to become a pastor. I knew no one in Austria, I did not speak German, I had no contacts of any sorts, I had no money to go back to Romania or to live for more than a day or two - but I knew the Lord called me to be a pastor, and, well, there I was! Within a few hours of entering Austria I had a place to live and was on the way to getting my scholarship to go to Capernwray in England for a one-year Bible School.

Or the time when, having received the visa to come to the UK, I had no money to buy the plane ticket - and yet I went to the travel agency and waited patiently in line, expecting the Lord to provide the money. It was the equivalent of my income for 5 months - but sure enough, the Lord provided them in an amazing way - but did so only after I got the first in line, facing the sales person and wondering what to tell her...

Or when I went back home to start a brand new church plant, having no clue how to plant a church, having no job, no income, no support structure, no backing of any sort - but trusting the Lord in all of this - AND asking him to give me at least 100 new believers within one year.
Sure enough, we passed the 100 mark exactly the same date one year later. As my little group and I shared the stories of the people we witnessed to and the many who prayed to receive the Lord that day, I suddenly realised we had lead to the Lord over 120 people - it was just over 20 people who had prayed the Lord into their life that day - and that afternoon was one year since I asked the Lord for those 100 people. Of course I was a bit upset - why didn't I ask for more?!? :-) And there are so many more stories like these...

I am now at a similar crossroads - I know I am where the Lord wants me, doing the service he asked me to do - and having no money, no support, no way to pay the bills and seeing no way forward. And this time around I find myself wavering, one moment I have that same unmovable faith I used to have - and the next, when faced with yet another bill, or yet another decision or question with no answer, I find myself wondering - what if the Lord will not step in this time? What if he will let me fail? I guess the experience of having failed to plant "Imagine" in Pittsburgh made me aware that sometimes faith is not enough. The Lord will answer - but his answer may be "No." Particularly when the situation is the way it is - I am not, like those years ago, in a poor country, in a church where people give all they can and more, but all we have simply falls short of what we need. I am in a church that has more than plenty, but chooses to back out of their responsibility to provide for the needs of the ministry - after having promised to do so only weeks ago. So, do I go out in faith, or do I stop, realising this problem is the result of disobedience on the part of the church? On the one hand, if they are not faithful, my duty is to continue in my own faithfulness. On the other hand - can I expect the Lord to make up for a shortfall stemming from disobedience?

Oh well - I have a couple of days to get the answer, and while it's scary, it is also exciting. Oh, the adrenaline rush of living by faith!

Monday morning high - again

We had another great service yesterday. I haven't counted the people in there - one of the deacons does that but he was away preaching at another church. By my estimate, there were about 50 people in the service. Again, a few of our regulars were not there, but we had lots of kids from the Boys' and Girls' Brigade, some of their parents, and a few other visitors. The Lord is doing awesome things in and through this church!

I had a chat with David last night - he's already thinking and planning ahead, has a bunch of great ideas - I like his spirit! If we get a few of the others to catch the vision, we're in for a wild ride this year.

One apparently small thing really touched my heart. At the end of the service, I got a hug from a little girl, and she started telling me all about things she did in the Girls' Brigade. And then her sister came, and soon I had a small group of children around me. I only met these kids two or three weeks ago - it's great to see them opening up and considering me part of the family. Some of them come from broken families, or from all sorts of difficult backgrounds. If we can offer them genuine love and care, we're already well on the way of influencing their life for eternity. And, who knows, maybe their parents will get to know the love of our Lord too.

Baby steps

Other pastors speak of the Monday morning low - when the Sunday excitement and bussiness is over, and you think of yesterday's sermon and wonder, "I said WHAT???" I had a few of those too.

But today it's a Monday morning high. We had two great services yesterday. A few kids from the GB and BB (that's Girls' Brigade and Boy's Brigade, for those of you who don't live in the UK) dragged their parents to church with them. Parents that don't normally go to any church, and don't have a relationship with the Lord - yet! Our BB and GB volunteers do a terrific job serving these children. We also had a record number of people for a regular service. Just to make sure you don't get the wrong idea - a regular service at Ford has been around 20-25 people lately. When the last pastor resigned they were considering closing down the church. But we had 29 people two Sundays ago, 31 last Sunday and 38 yesterday - if we keep this momentum, we should be OK a few months from now.
What excites me most is not the numbers, but the kind of people that form that number. Officially we have 14 members. A few of these are older people who are house bound. The people who come to our services are not transfers or visitors from other churches - they are people who don't yet belong to the Lord, or new believers who haven't had a chance to join a church yet. What excites me is the number of parents who are not believers, but come to drop their children to church and then pick them up after the service. Three of them stayed on yesterday; I hope many more will join us in the future. Of course we have a long way to go - there is a large community of mostly unsaved people all around us. But every soul saved is a miracle of God's grace. Baby steps...

I'm in!

Well, apparently, this is it. Tonight, the church body at Ford Baptist Church unanimously voted to call me as their pastor. Of course, we have to go through all the hoops to do with the Baptist Union and accreditation and stuff - but that's supposed to be just details. I have a new family - and a ministry! I am so very excited about it!

the highs and the lows

One privilege on being a pastor is that you get to take part in the highs and the lows of people around you. You get to experience life with them - and to lift them in prayer before our Father.

Yesterday my wonderful lady and I visited a former member of our church. She is in her 70's, and until last week, shared her home with her grandson. Now he is gone - suicide.
We will never know why this brilliant 19 year old chose to end his life. As a suicide survivor said, most people who attempt or commit suicide don't really want to die - they just don't know how to live. How I wish things were different!

There were no words to say, to comfort this lady. Her husband died a few short years back. Her son died recently. Now her grandson is gone too. All I could do was to give her a warm embrace and pray for her - and to listen to anything she wanted to talk about. I think that's all anyone can do in circumstances like these. Be there, show her love and support, a shoulder to cry on and an open heart. I left there saddened and encouraged in the same time. Saddened by the tragedy in this lady's life. Encouraged by a Father who loves her and chose to use my wife and I as a little reminder of that love.

Today was a very different day. Our church building was invaded by a bunch of 5 year olds from the local school. It was part of their Religious Education class - a visit to a local church. I got to tell them a bit about being a Baptist, about Jesus Christ who died on a cross for us - and who is symbolised in the cross on the wall and the bread and wine on the Communion table. About repentance and 'starting again' in baptism. One boy had a mock baptism - I must confess I changed the 'liturgy' a bit. Instead of the standard baptism questions, I asked him if he'll stop fighting with his sister and if he promises to be good in school (he said Yes!!!!) - and then he was baptised in a pool with pretend water.

The whole thing was a lot of fun. All the children went down in the baptistry - we have stairs on both ends, so we had a line of kids coming down one set of stairs and up the other. They admired the 100 year old pipe organ, the stain glass windows, the wood carvings, the banners - and, as the teachers said, this was for many of them the first time they've ever been in a Christian church.

It was a first contact, but now apparently I am in a lot of truble. They promised to bring other classes over for visits throughout the year. I am supposed to get scheduled to lead some of their assemblies. Community outreach - and this is a door that 'opened itself', all I had to do was to say 'yes.'

Last time "preaching with a view"

... or so I hope! :o

The Vote is Tuesday, but already the deacons treat me as their pastor. And I really feel that they are my church. But today was the last time I was here as a visiting preacher.

This is what "prodigal John" says on his blog (http://stufffchristianslike.blogspot.com), about 'audition sermons': "1. I'd preach part 2 of a 3 part sermon series.
Forget this one off nonsense. I'm coming in and preaching the second part of a three part series. I'm starting right in the middle of the conversation. You want to hear the dramatic conclusion? You want to know how this Biblical cliffhanger of a sermon ends? Curious about where the series began, or what I would call the "prequel?" You'd have to invite me back to preach again."

Well, this is more or less what I did. I began a series from John the first time they called me, back in December. Today I let them know that it was a series.... If they want to hear the rest, they have vote me in on Tuesday. :)

It would be interesting if it goes south... I'm already scheduled to preach there for the next few Sundays, so if there is a No vote, that'll make for some interesting crowd dynamics!

We passed another hurdle today. My buddy Eddy came to his dad's church, and loved it! I was afraid he'll miss Hope - they are an amazingly great church, and I feel a bit bad to take my family from there in order to join a much smaller church. But Eddy really loved the Sunday School - Well done, Lord! There is this girl, Rachel - she is only 18, but she is AMAZING! I watched her interact with the kids at the Boys' Brigade on Wednesday - if there ever was a person gifted to work with children, it's her! So great to have people like her on the team! Eddy said he loves her. OK, don't take it the wrong way - he's a bit young for that kind of love - well, he has a girlfriend his own age, sort of. But to hear him say that did a lot to boost this daddy's confidence that he's doing the right thing.

On Tuesday I have this bunch of 5 year olds from the local primary school descending on me. Put me in front of thousands of mean looking adults, and I'm OK. But send a bunch of 5 year olds my way, and I'm scared witless! I love kids, but I always feel like I don't know quite how to keep them interested and entertained. As a father of 4, this does not speak highly of my parenting skills... Anyway, after being in the States for a few years, it's great to realise I'm in a country where schools will call on churches for help and would drop in for a visit with a bunch of kids. I am hoping this will develop into a lasting relationship with the school. They are just down the road from us.

So here I am, already making plans, developing a vision, trying to lay down a path... Maybe I'm a bit too excited about it all? I guess what makes me so pumped up is the deep sense that I'm exactly where the Lord wants me, and that He is going to come through for us in a big way. He's such a great God! OK, he does have some questionable choices when it comes to pastors for his churches - at least one of them.... But I am so in love with him!

I am so blessed!

Last week a group of us from Ford went to visit Flo, a 90-something young lady from our church. We chatted, we had communion, we admired the amazing matchstick ship model she builds... It broke my heart to know that she has not had communion in years - there was noone to bring it to her, and she is house-bound. And yet she didn't complain - she loves the Lord, she loves his Church, she keeps up to date with what is going on - and she is praying for us.

On Monday my wonderful wife and I went to visit Edie, another young lady, in her 80's, also house bound. She just came home from the hospital; we went there just for a chat and a prayer - hoping to be a blessing to her. In fact, it was us who were blessed. I could see Evelina filled with the joy of being there. Find the elderly, the sick, the needy, and she is in her element. And, sure enough, we got another prayer warrior interceding for us. Edie promised to keep Evelina and I in her prayers - the Lord knows how we need that.

Today I went to the Boys' Brigade. There were less than 20 boys tonight - but altogether, this little church has about 40 youngsters enrolled in the Boys Brigade and the Girls Brigade. 40 young lives being touched with the love of Christ - and through them, their families too. For me tonight was lots of fun. Beyond that, however, is the realisation of how wonderful this church is. They had years of hurt, of pain, of decline. And yet, rather than focusing on themselves, they are as outward focused as ever. They look for ways to help the community. They pray, and encourage, and love, and support. They spend their time, and money, and effort, in order to touch others with the grace and love from our Daddy.

And here am I, this wondering, lost, uprooted guy - called to be a part of this work of God's grace. I am from another country, another culture, I am just a stranger - and yet they embraced me as their own. I have no illusions - it is going to be a long and difficult jurney - but, I am so blessed! I could have ended in any of the disfunctional, selfish, inward-focused, consumer churches out there - and yet the Lord lead me to these dear ones. I have such a gift for messing things up, and getting things wrong - and yet I am so blessed!

News and stuff

Well, I've been posting (occasionally) to the p.com blog, since I forgot the login to this one. It eventually came back to me, so here I go again :-)

The News.... I am in a new church (Ford Baptist Church), a new town (Plymouth), a new country (UK), a new job (self-employed database programmer and website designer - well, apart from pastoring) and - I don't know, there so many new things going on! Just getting out of this very dark valley, but hey, I probably needed this experience too. How else would I serve those who are going through this same road?

Oh, and I'm so very excited with this new church I'm in. Well, it's about 150 years 'new', in a poorer inner city neighborhood, big crumbling building, lots of hurts and needs and problems - but hey, I love this bunch of people. I am so looking forward to what the Lord is going to do with us here! This time I hope it's for the long haul, there is no INS to chase me out, we should be fine; if only we can get some income....

Anyway, the Lord is good, He has been taking care of us and guiding us through, so here we are.